Saturday, December 30, 2017

12/30/2017

I dreamt of a place that looked like a nearby pet cafe or a groomer’s, but there were lots of people and their dogs hanging out with their peers. I followed the sound of dogs happily barking and arrived at my final destination. There was a large area cordoned off to other humans to ensure that the dogs were allowed to play with each other in peace. Someone - a brunette who wore her hair in a ponytail - sat towards the corner and kept a watchful eye on them, ready to break up any fight that might ensue between the furkids. I observed as she returned her attention to my dog and gave him her love. My dog saw me standing there and refused to acknowledge me. I figured that it’ll be better if I leave him there since he loved the place too much.

In another scene, the three friends were together. It was getting late, so I went to grab something from the upstairs of my friend’s florist shop. I stumbled upon the crime scene of a gruesome murder. There were two bodies: one female and one male. The walls were stained with what looked like gushes of blood from stab wounds. I rushed down the stairs in a panicked mode and couldn’t quite explain what I saw to my friend.

That’s the problem of falling into a troubled sleep, I guess. I was only able to remember snippets of the dream, but it was enough for me to work with. My subconscious used the pet cafe to associate my desire to socialize with dogs and, hopefully, be comforted by their infectious friendliness. It knows that this is a foolproof method to make me happier than I currently am. Based on the online interpretation, the brunette in my dream is someone whom I highly respect and has the intuition and loyalty that I wish I have.

As for the crime scene, I’d say that something has murdered my emotions until I’m struggling to experience any positive feelings, i.e. happiness or joy. I hate the thing that has taken away my ability to experience life, hence the blood splatter.

Friday, December 29, 2017

12/29/2017

I dreamed that I was hanging out in someone’s house. It was a small unit with a beautiful design. The owner maximized the limited space with mirrors to create the illusion that it looked bigger than it actually was. An older lady - who was the owner of the house - was hanging out her laundry on the clothesline as I rushed past her. There was a fence at the back that led to another entrance of a hill. Over the entrance was a lake with a path created around it. A family of four was taking a slow stroll and admiring the scenery before them. Although I couldn’t see their faces, I knew that there were two children - a boy and a girl.

I was shopping for groceries in the evening when a male friend dragged me out of the building to the main road after I paid for my items. Behind him was an abandoned building. He confessed something, which led me to explore the place where we lived from south to north. I can’t remember what it was, but it must’ve been an urgent matter. Somewhere along our journey, we came across a crashed plane bearing the logo of the national airline. There was a burnt corpse lying right in front of the plane, which frightened me. I froze to the ground in my fear - although my friend pulled my arm, begging me to just move.

The online dream interpretation indicated that dreaming of a corpse could mean that my soul has withered to the point where I’m in a dark corner. As for the house and the hill, it could be the emotions and the subconscious making a mess out of each other at this time of the year.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Crying all alone under the stars

Note: the title post is part of the lyrics of 'Travelin' Soldier' by Dixie Chicks.

After a torturous semester, I now have updates - let’s make that two - for you guys.

#1: Now that I’m reflecting on the semester, there were some moments that I loved and disliked. The course that I wanted to enroll in was finally offered. I knew that it would be hectic, but I went for it with full confidence that it won’t get any worse than that. I mean, having three rest days to catch up on the backdated work and take a breather could have easily compensated me for the bullet train speed.

And worse, it did.

The first half of the semester drained me so much that I struggled to convince myself to attend the Corporate tutorials. The expression on his face was similar to the one that I saw in someone’s eyes before college graduation: a masked annoyance at the coincidence. I’m always able to suppress the fears or worries whenever I’m in class, but this safety blanket barely worked for Corporate. Let’s just say that my emotions and the lack of adequate diversion suddenly got in the way of the academic goals. I looked at the formative assessment with such confusion that I told myself not to hope for much for the overall grade. It was better to work for the best that I can get while expecting the unexpected.

I definitely pushed myself a little over the breaking point - until the ADR presentation took a beating. Although I survived the battle (in short, I passed everything), I didn’t emerge unscathed. My psyche feels such weighed down that I’m in need for any type of vacation that allows me a quiet environment to crash for 12 - 14+ hours. I’m also in need for some cardio exercise that will clear the congested brain in preparation for the final year’s crazy schedule.

#2: I’m sure you’d have seen snippets of it splashed on the blog and Twitter account, but let’s make this the official announcement, shall we? What took me 5 - 6 years of writing and two plot changes has finally arrived to this. What saw me swimming in memories and left me with an aching heart has also finally arrived to this.

Remember how I mentioned in a couple of posts ago that I’m tying up the loose ends for my e-book? Here’s the link: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/760802 . Some elements of my time in college has been woven into certain parts of the plot, but in a fictional way. The plot involves a slight twinge of heartbreak, a dash of betrayal, and a splash of the unexpected.

I’m not going to reveal anything more than that, so if you’d like to read more (i.e. the blurb, short summary and a sample of the manuscript) or purchase the e-book in its entirety, head on over to the link - and let me know what you think about it.

Depending on how things go, I might continue moonlighting as a writer.
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